Thursday, May 22, 2008

Yanks Make Bold Decision to Convert Joba to...Latvian Orthodox??

In a shocking twist of events after a lot of chatter and belching from Yankees Owner Hank Steinbrenner (aka Little Stein), Brian Cashman released information prior to last night's game and changed course on his previous intentions with superstar young gun pitcher Joba Chamberlain. Chamberlain, a starting pitcher for Nebraska in college, has been used as the setup man to Mariano Rivera, throwing heat and beating up geeks in the 8th inning before handing the ball over to the greatest closer in the history of baseball. There has been much discussion regarding moving Joba into a starting role to better benefit the team by using all of his talent. Cashman issued the following statement regarding the conversion of the prized young Yankee arm: "Joba will remain in the bullpen for now and will be working towards becoming a starter later in the season. While he will not be converting now per se, he will be converting in another way, that is to the Latvian Orthodox Church. Chamberlain grew up in an American Indian household but since meeting the love of his life, he is intent on avoiding 'The Kavorka' and making the conversion to Latvian Orthodox. We should all applaud Joba for his bold move and wish him and Sister Roberta nothing but the best of luck going forward."

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