The Cedric Benson Booze-Hound Stories Roll on...

Recently released former Chicago Bears RB Cedric Benson has had a very eventful offseason which began with his intoxicated boating arrest, escalated to a DWI arrest and concluded with his outright release from the Bears organization due to these behavioral and alcohol-induced problems. On May 3, the former Texas star was charged with boating while intoxicated on Lake Travis and resisting arrest. A few weeks later, he was charged with driving while intoxicated when he was pulled over in downtown Austin. Now the teamless alkie has been instructed to install an ignition lock breathalyzer in his car. This way, Cedric the Booze Hound will not physically be able to drive his car while blacked out and looking for underage hookers. Thank goodness for the justice system!

Benson Latest Pepper Sprayed Athlete

Chicago Bears RB Cedric Benson (shown left, on a stick), the 4th overall pick in the 2005 draft, was charged with boating while intoxicated and resisting arrest Saturday night near Austin, Texas. Following a failed sobriety test while on his boat, Benson resisted a second test on land and refused to put on a life jacket, which resulted in him being pepper sprayed. This is just the latest arrest in a long list of publicized NFL off-the-field incidents including Michael Vick and Pacman Jones. Benson, who has recently consulted with former Vikings love boat experts Daunte Culpepper, Bryant McKinnie and Fred Smoot, hopes to 'remove the stick from [my] you-know-where' and prove to the Bears and to his nay-sayers around the league that he was worth the high draft selection and has a future as a starting running back in the NFL. This all starts with the removal of that stick, which I can imagine can be extremely uncomfortable while playing football.